Limerick Woman (Attitude Study)

It's weird in this cold dark country how the women seem to have evolved to utilise make-up foundation as a way to change ones own skin tone to another. Many women walk through the shopping malls in their best pair of pyjama's, with an iridescent orange face - presumably designed to give off the impression of a healthy tan. But the tan stops at the jaw line, the concept of 'blending' having been bred from the gene-pool along with shoulders and good teeth.

What lies beneath, from jaw to cleavage, is the natural pale blue if Irish skin. A pale green eye-shadow is often selected to complement this and heavy black eye liner ensures the look of an infant at mummy's make-up table is complete. Add large gold hoop earrings and you're nearly there.

Lastly adopt a look of aggressive distaste one might use after stepping in something nasty.